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The Nazi Officer's Wife: How One Jewish Woman Survived the Holocaust

Are you hungry? Did you want two bagels stacked with spreads on spreads on spreads," my mom will ask you when you visit. And twenty minutes after you've walked in. And again an hour later. The correct answer is always "yes" and the correct follow-up question is "This must be your mother's recipe, right? You call that thing from the supermarket a bagel? More like a nay -gel.

Not sorry.

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A bagel is an experience. A privilege.

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Your scooped-out bread ball with low-fat cream cheese is offensive to me. Please know I'm going to bitch my way through anything that's not large and smelly in the best way possible.

She's not fuxing around with kugel. Or brisket.

Or latkes or matzo ball soup. Jewish food is delicious when done right and, again, by "right" I mean exactly the way it was prepared for me each holiday growing up. I'm big on tradition.

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And food. I take these things seriously. You might not want to talk to my mom that much, but if you want to ride with me, you're going to have to.

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Jewish girls love their mothers. Mothers are their families. Families are really important to Jewish people, they just are.

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Even if you never met before you started dating, she probably knows at least two people in your life. It's called Jewish geography and it's the world's greatest ice breaker.

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